Monday, September 25, 2006

Three questions and a hypothesis

1. Shouldn't my boobs be getting bigger? I think they're smaller now than they were during the first trimester, and less dense. Or maybe my big ole belly is simply making them look small by comparison. In any case, they definitely don't seem to be growing. This concerns me a little bit. I hope they'll burgeon properly toward the end...

2. WHAT compels people to write thank you notes in the voice of their baby / child? As in "thank you for the beautiful blanket. My mommy wraps me up in it whenever we go out on walks." Ugh! Bleah! Gross! I'm sorry, call me a spoilsport, but I find this practice extremely un-cute and wholly annoying. I vow never to do it, ever.

3. Why, in books about natural childbirth, are the women in the photos and illustrations all completely naked? I mean, is it really necessary to be completely nude to labor and give birth naturally? I suppose if you're hot and sweaty and working hard, it might be more comfortable and practical to be unencumbered by clothing. But I get the feeling that these women are doing it to feel primal or natural or something. Most of the time their husbands are half-naked, too. I don't know; maybe it's because they all live in California. Anyway, there's just a little too much old Yankee WASP in me to long for this sort of communion with....whatever. I'll take a hospital gown, please. And one of those cute little surgical hats for my husband.

4. I think one of the girls had the hiccups last night. I was lying in bed, trying to fall asleep, when I felt a series of powerful little monkey convulsions in there, about 10 seconds apart. It lasted for a minute or two, and made me laugh out loud.

6 Comments:

Blogger Motel Manager said...

I am so with you on the notes-in-baby's-voice thing. The ONLY one I ever received that I actually thought was funny instead of annoying/insane was when some friends made their child's voice extremely formal, florid, and I dare say British. Still, I would never do it.

10:41 AM  
Blogger Karana said...

No worries - the boobs will catch up with the rest of you towards the end. At least, mine did! Seriously, if you are planning on nursing, put off purchasing the bras until as late as possible. Or buy one or two just to have something - and then take in a very quick shopping trip after the babies are born and your milk comes in to buy the rest. I bought before hand, and boy, were they small!

Good luck!

10:51 AM  
Blogger TLB said...

God, yes, I second the Motel Manager about the thank-you notes. My sister does it all the time; I may eventually strangle her.

3:24 PM  
Blogger scruffylooking said...

I can't stand sappy baby talk for any reason. It makes me even more snarky than I already am.

As far as your boobs are concerned, don't wish too hard. I got up to an E cup and cried. I asked the sales woman if they even made bras that big and she said, "Oh honey, they go all the way up to M." Eek.

I assure you that when your milk comes in, you will look like a porn star.

6:32 PM  
Blogger juliloquy said...

Hi! I just found you through Iowadrift. Best wishes in your pregnancy. (1) Like the commenters said above, it's just plain obnoxious when the milk comes in. And then (if you're like me), after you wean, they look all deflated and you'll wear a smaller size than before pregnancy. (2) I hate this, too! (And beyond thank-you notes to entire blogs. bleah.) Mostly because of the cutesy, but also because it seems presumptuous to try to give voice to what's actually going on in their minds. (3) That's a good observation. I wonder if the publishers choose these photos because they might look less dated without the bell-bottom, peasant shirt indicators. (4) I LOVED the in-utero baby hiccups! Makes me want to get knocked up again . . .

1:04 PM  
Anonymous rch said...

As everyone already said, your boobs will grow for sure, and be careful what you wish for. I made the mistake of shopping for nursing bras before I gave birth - at that point I was up to a size E. After my milk came in, I was a size H! Scary. Thankfully they have deflated back to almost their normal size, though I am still a bit busty.

Hmmm...the baby voice thing seems annoying - I sure hope I didn't do it, but the first few weeks of E's life are a total blur and I wouldn't be surprised if I did. I definitely won't do it next time!

8:01 PM  

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